The Blog of Peter Filias

…a self-proclaimed Computer Ninja

“Lost”

May 20th, 2009

I got this sent to me by my good friend, Jon:

A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him,
“Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don’t know where I am.”
The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, “You’re in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and* *100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.
“She rolled her eyes and said, “You must be a Republican.” “I am,” replied the man. “How did you know?”
“Well,” answered the balloonist, “everything you told me is technically correct. But I have no idea what to do with your information, and I’m still lost. Frankly, you’ve not been much help to me.”
The man smiled and responded, “You must be an Obama Democrat.”
“I am,” replied the balloonist. “How did you know?”
“Well,” said the man, “you don’t know where you are or where you are going. You’ve risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You’re in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it’s my fault.”

Bar Stool Economics

October 20th, 2008

Thanks to Sean for sending this along!

Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten comes
to $100. If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go
something like this:

The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing.
The fifth would pay $1.
The sixth would pay $3.
The seventh would pay $7.
The eighth would pay $12.
The ninth would pay $18.
The tenth man (the richest) would pay $59.

So, that’s what they decided to do.

The ten men drank in the bar every day and seemed quite happy with the
arrangement, until on day, the owner threw them a curve. “Since you are
all such good customers,” he said, “I’m going to reduce the cost of
your daily beer by $20.”Drinks for the ten now cost just $80.


The group still wanted to pay their bill the way we pay our taxes so the first
four men were unaffected. They would still drink for free. But what about the
other six men – the paying customers? How could they divide the $20 windfall so
that everyone would get his ‘fair share?’ They realized that $20 divided by six
is $3.33. But if they subtracted that from everybody’s share, then the fifth
man and the sixth man would each end up being paid to drink his beer. So, the
bar owner suggested that it would be fair to reduce each man’s bill by roughly
the same amount, and he proceeded to work out the amounts each should pay.


And so:

The fifth man, like the first four, now paid nothing (100% savings).

The sixth now paid $2 instead of $3 (33%savings).
The seventh now pay $5 instead of $7 (28%savings).
The eighth now paid $9 instead of $12 (25% savings).
The ninth now paid $14 instead of $18 (22% savings).
The tenth now paid $49 instead of $59 (16% savings).

Each of the six was better off than before. And the first four continued to
drink for free. But once outside the restaurant, the men began to compare their
savings.


“I only got a dollar out of the $20,”declared the sixth man. He
pointed to the tenth man,” but he got $10!”


“Yeah, that’s right,” exclaimed the fifth man. “I only saved a
dollar, too. It’s unfair that he got ten times more than I!”


“That’s true!!” shouted the seventh man. “Why should he get $10
back when I got only two? The wealthy get all the breaks!”


“Wait a minute,” yelled the first four men in unison. “We didn’t
get anything at all. The system exploits the poor!”


The nine men surrounded the tenth and beat him up.


The next night the tenth man didn’t show up for drinks, so the nine sat down
and had beers without him. But when it came time to pay the bill, they
discovered something important. They didn’t have enough money between all of
them for even half of the bill!


And that, boys and girls, journalists and college professors, is how our tax
system works. The people who pay the highest taxes get the most benefit from a
tax reduction. Tax them too much, attack them for being wealthy, and they just
may not show up anymore. In fact, they might start drinking overseas where the
atmosphere is somewhat friendlier.


David R. Kamerschen, Ph.D.

Professor of Economics
University of Georgia

Difference between Republican and Democrat

October 20th, 2008

Thanks for sending this, Dave!

A young woman was about to finish her first year of college. Like so many others her age, she considered herself to be a very liberal Democrat, and among other liberal ideals, was very much in favor of higher taxes to support more government programs, in other words redistribution of wealth.

She was deeply ashamed that her father was a rather staunch Republican, a feeling she openly expressed. Based on the lectures that she had participated in, and an occasional chat with various professors, she felt that her father had for years harbored an evil, selfish desire to keep what he thought should be his.

One day she was challenging her father on his opposition to higher taxes on the rich and the need for more government programs. The self-professed objectivity proclaimed by her professors had to be the truth and she indicated so to her father. He responded by asking how she was doing in school.

Taken aback, she answered rather haughtily that she had a 4.0 GPA, and let him know that it was tough to maintain, insisting that she was taking a very difficult course load and was constantly studying, which left her no time to go out and party like other people she knew. She didn’t even have time for a boyfriend, and didn’t really have many college friends because she spent all her time studying.

Her father listened and then asked, ‘How is your friend Audrey doing?’
She replied, ‘Audrey is barely getting by. All she takes are easy classes, she never studies, and she barely has a 2.0 GPA. She is so popular on campus; college for her is a blast. She’s always invited to all the parties and lots of times she doesn’t even show up for classes the next day because she’s too hung over.’

Her wise father asked his daughter, ‘Why don’t you go to the Dean’s office and ask him to deduct 1.0 off your GPA and give it to your friend who only has a 2.0. That way you will both have a 3.0 GPA and certainly that would be a fair and equal distribution of GPA.’

The daughter, visibly shocked by her father’s suggestion, angrily fired back, ‘That’s a crazy idea. That would not be fair! I’ve worked really hard for my grades! I’ve invested a lot of time, and a lot of hard work! Audrey has done next to nothing toward her degree. She played while I worked my tail off!’

The father slowly smiled, winked and said gently, ‘Welcome to the Republican party.’

I can’t think of a more appropriate explanation than this.

The Blog of Peter Filias

…a self-proclaimed Computer Ninja